Seeing the truth…

Sometimes life and its events give us the right tools to realise that something or someone in our life doesn’t show their true colours. This happened to me last week – a supposed “dear friend” disappointed me.

Someways I was always expecting for it to happen…you know when one friend always criticised the people around them you always know that they might do the same when you are not around and talk about you.

Can’t say that when it happened i wasn’t angry or sad…but I gave myself the time to analyse and realised that maybe what happened should just give me a lesson.

We all have our defects and sometimes these might overshadow our qualities. And maybe the way I heard her talk about me is really the way she feels and maybe in some ways Instead of being angry I should learn from it and change the way I do things sometimes. And maybe what we’ve shared in other moments of our life should be the ones that won instead of that ugly moment.

She apologised and I guess that should mean a lot to me.

I can’t say that I am happy with what happened either and I can’t say that the way I act with her is the same as I did before but I strongly believe that with time we will pass this. Is it not what true friends do? Forgive each other?

How would you feel if your 4 year old was judged like she was 14? Because this is what happened. My child misbehaved and than everything exploded around the situation?

I try not to discuss what happens between parents, adults with my daughters. But it seems that not all parents are like that. It seems that other parents are and than their children behaviour is changing too…

How would you feel if suddenly your “friends” children would suddenly treat your child like it was the worse person in the world?

And they are only 4 and the only thing they done was cry and denied doing what it was asked for them to do by someone that wasn’t their parent?

Every day I am surprised about how mean, judgemental and silly can some people be. I try as much as I can to be the best parent for my girls. I try to teach them well although their characters are so different, although I am mostly single parent them.

I teach them to be good and treat their friends and others with kindness but what can I answer them when they see the others treat them with so much unkindness?

I chose to keep on telling the girls to be the good ones in any situation, to be the ones that will treat things with positiveness and the ones that will offer a shoulder to cry and arms to cuddle to the one that needs it.

But what if they don’t receive the same treatment from the so called friends?

Miss A is still little and so unaware when the others might not like her and the others might not accept her. But Miss K always asks me why do I tell her to act differently than the others? Cause thats what she sees around mostly…kids and parents that are her opposite…

I know difficult questions.

Hopefully they will grow up to be could people like I like to think I am. That will always be there for the weak, that will never just walk away from a friendship, a person that will prefer to talk issues and not have an argument…I really hope that this mean world will not affect them too much.

What would you do if you heard a good friend talk badly about you? Would you forgive her/him like I am trying to do?

Or do you think I am silly and I should try and walk away from this relationship?

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15 Comments

  • Rhi

    I’d like to think I’d forgive but I have walked away in that situation. Sometimes it’s not what people do or say about you but how you react to it is important.

  • Ana De- Jesus

    Oh man I am sorry to hear about your ‘friend’ and her kids and the way they treated your kid. Your kid is only 4, its not fair for them to be condemned :/

  • CATALINA NINI

    I have always believed people will act accordingly; a kind person will do good no matter what, a mean person will just be nasty. We all learn from our mistakes of trusting our “friends”. Take care Otilia and loads of kisses for your daughters. Pupici

    PS: I hope your “dear friend” reads this and she is ashamed.

    • Otilia

      Oh catalina. thank you for your kind words…Nu stiu daca va citi…the reason I wrote about this is because I felt the need to and because I wanted some advice. Thank you x

  • Michelle Kellogg

    I don’t accept people who talk behind my back. For one thing, I see that as cowardly and that is a false friendship. For two, NO ONE disrespects my kids! I commend your handling of the situation though. I’m just not one who puts up with crap from others, especially when it comes to my kids. However, I agree with you about teaching your children to not act the way everyone else does. It seems to be harder and harder for us parents to teach our children to be better people when everyone else around them is so disrespectful and hateful. But we must keep trying to teach these core values to our kids because there has to be hope for the future.

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